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Commons of House

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Commons of House is a song debuted in Episode 047 in 1988 and parodies several rap groups from the time such as N.W.A., Salt'n'Pepa and Run-D.M.C. It was released on the 20 Great Golden Gobs record.



Commons of House-003:11

Commons of House-0



Composer: Philip Pope

Lyrics: Steve Brown and David Haldane

Debut: Episode 047

Running Time: 2:43

Characters (in order of appearance):

Lyrics Edit

Commons of house

David Owen breakdances

Voiceover: This is a journey into a lunatic asylum.

Speaker: Order! Or-or-or-or-order!


SINGERS: House of Commons, Commons of House.

Nigel Lawson: I'm the coolest cat

Geoffery Howe: And I'm a little mouse

SINGERS: House of Commons, where nothing's ever changed

Neil Kinnock: I'll fight and die for my country

Margaret Thatcher: We'll see if that can be arranged


Edwina Currie: There's a doctor in the house, but no nurses in the hospital

David Owen: Jack your body, j-j-jack your body (body)

David Steel: For God's sake, David, don't give in.

Speaker: Order! Or-or-order!

Roy Hattersley: Ooh, I'll have a steak please


SINGERS: House of Commons, Commons of House

Leon Brittan, Roy Hattersley, Cyril Smith: We are the fat ones

Norman Tebbit: And I'm the skinny yob

SINGERS: House of Commons, where everyone's a star

Neil Kinnock: Hey listen man, I'm bad!

Tony Benn: Yes, as leader, you certainly are.


Edwina Currie: Push it, push it real good Cecil

Singer: (Push it)

Ron Brown: Drop the mace, drop the mace

Michael Heseltine:And wave it about

Nigel Lawson: Drop your wads, drop your wads, drop your wads on the counter

Ken Livingstone: Tony Benn, Tony Benn is a bad young brother, in actual fact


SINGERS: House of Commons, to be an MP

Margaret Thatcher: You must keep talking rap,

Neil Kinnock: That's rap with a capital C

SINGERS: House of Commons, how common can you get

Neil Kinnock: Hey what's your favourite group Roy?

Roy Hattersley: Rush, Rush Rush!


SINGERS: House of Commons, Commons of House

Neil Kinnock: Ah, Roy, you big fat...

Edwina Currie: Push it, push it, don't force it! We're going to have big fun.

(The following goes on during the credits.)

SINGERS: House of Commons, Commons of House

Douglas Hurd: I'm a ni-ni-ni-ni-ni-ni-ninety-nine... our house.

Neil Kinnock: Ah, shut up, a lot of you, you bastards. All of you, get out, Out! Out!

SINGERS: House of Commons, Commons of House

Edwina Currie: Only, word's up, babies.

SINGERS: House of Commons, Commons of House

Other politican: The problem will be, that no-one will ever be... erm...

SINGERS: House of Commons, Commons of House

Douglas Hurd: You want it open or wrapped?

Neil Kinnock: GET OUT!

SINGERS: House of Commons, Commons of House

Nicholas Ridley (simulated): Build a house, build a house, build a house, on the greenbelt.

Edwina Currie (simulated): Oh, Cecil! Must be yours.

Roy Hattersley: {unknown}

Neil Kinnock: Say that again, Roy?

SINGERS: House of Commons, Commons of House

Other politican: Notice the messy compartment.

Edwina Currie: What ya mean, you need a whole lot of roses?

SINGERS: House of Commons, Commons of House.

Douglas Hurd: Our house.

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