The Fat Song is a song debuted in Episode 004 in 1984 and makes fun of the size of the Cabinet.

The Fat Song02:26

The Fat Song

Composer: Philip Pope

Debut: Episode 004


Question Time Audience

Lyrics Edit

Robin Day: "Yes, that's a fascinating point but let's have another question please. The lady at the back with the sparkly thing on her head, come on."

Queen Elizabeth II: "I've tried not to mention it: I thought it might be rude.

I don't want my words to be personally construed

But I must ask you, have you ever noticed that

Everyone in the Cabinet is fat?"

Robin Day: "Yes, you're absolutely right

Geoffery Howe is and always has been a podge

Leon Brittan's a man impossible to dodge

In Number 11 Lawson's had to reinforce the floors

Whitelaw goes through ceilings, he's far too fat for doors"

Cabinet: "Fat, Fat, Fat.

We're fatter than a cat

If any cat was quite this fat

The fact is he'd not be a cat

He'd be an elephant! Or something like that

Fat, Fat, Fat"

Harold Macmillan: "Douglas-Home was thin, he's no longer there"

Harold Wilson: "Heseltine's not bad, but he's got fat hair"

Alec Douglas-Home: "What of Tebbit?" Harold Wilson: "The deep supporter cries"

James Callaghan: "Yes it's true to say he's thin but he tells fat lies"

Cabinet: "She likes us Fat, Fat, Fat

We're fatter than a cat

If any cat was quite this fat

The fact is he'd not be a cat

He's be a whale! Or something like that

Fat, Fat, Fat"

Harold Macmillian: "Roy's pink and huge"

Harold Wilson: "Jenkin is nicely plump"

Alec Douglas-Home: "Fowler's a bit easy"

James Callaghan: "But then he's such a chump!"

Robin Day:"He'll soon join the thinnies, like Gilmore and Pym"

Margaret Thatcher: "All of them sacked" Robin Day and Margaret Thatcher: "Just for being thin"

Question Time Audience:(except the Queen) "She likes them Fat, Fat, Fat

They're fatter than a cat"

Cabinet: "If any cat was quite as fat

He'd be a hippopotomous! Or something like that

Fat, Fat, Fat"

Cyril Smith: Just bloody take a look at that. A disgrace to the nation. Look at the state of them. What sort of example of that to set the nation? What they need a bloody good diet.

Caption appeared, saying: Directed by Philip Casson © Central Independent Television plc 1984

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